How NOT to Do Film Parodies: A Not-so-loving Look at Aaron Seltzer's <em>Date Movie</em>

Ever since the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker team took a 1950s aircraft-in-peril movie titled Zero Hour and skewered its melodramatic excesses in the now-classic Airplane!, the "film parody" sub-genre of comedy films has spawned hit-and-miss efforts that encompass all kinds of Hollywood genres...action-adventure (Hot Shots!)...spy/war movies (Top Secret!)...teen sex comedies (Not Another Teen Movie)...and horror shlockers (Dracula: Dead and Loving It, Scary Movie 1-3).

Most of these parodies follow the same formula: take familiar character types and situations from the genre you are lampooning, cast popular and semi-popular actors to draw in viewers, then make as many visual or situational references to big films in the above-mentioned genre, adding as many ridiculous touches as you possibly can.

In an ideal situation, as in Airplane! or the older Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein, the trick is to have the actors play the roles as straight and seriously as possible while adding the funny dialogue or hilarious visual joke. The juxtaposition of the dry performances and the humorous detail is what makes a film parody work.

Unfortunately, the current batch of supposedly "loving comic tributes" to formula films (including the Scary Movies) tends to focus excessively on the jokes without even asking for performances from the actors. Instead of taking their cues from the ZAZ team or even Mel Brooks and telling the cast to not let audiences know that they are in on the jokes, Jason Friedman and Aaron Seltzer allow Allyson Hannigan, Adam Campbell, Sophie Monk, and their cast-mates to mug, wink-and-nod, and practically shout to the viewer, "Hey, we are making fun of My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Bridget Jones' Diary, Napoleon Dynamite, Shallow Hal, Wedding Crashers, Hitch, When Harry Met Sally, The Bachelor, and even Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith!"

The plot, if you want to call it that, centers on Julia Jones (Hannigan), a seriously overweight girl who falls for the handsome Grant Fockyerdoder (Campbell) when he stops for coffee at her parents' Greek restaurant. In a mish-mash of story points cribbed from Hitch, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, and every mediocre to bad romantic comedy ever made, Julia gets an extreme makeover in what looks like an auto paint and body shop and becomes a sexy slinky "babe" who, after getting engaged to Grant, meets his parents (a wasted Fred Willard and Jennifer Coolidge) and has to contend with his almost-ready-for-porn-movies ex-fiancee Andy (Monk). 

And as viewers of any of the quickly disposable romantic comedies being "skewered" here can tell you, hilarity supposedly arises from a series of misunderstandings, comedic errors, and stereotypical situations where everything goes as predicted no matter what.

Grant Funkyerdoder: [voice-over reading his message to Julia] If you still love me the way I love you, meet me where Meg Ryan met Tom Hanks.
Julia Jones: On the Internet?
Grant Funkyerdoder: [still in voice-over] No, not in "You've Got Mail," in "Sleepless in Seattle."

However, director Seltzer makes the fatal error of focusing way too much on the visual jokes and references to other films and not on the actors' performances. He just takes entire sequences from other films and plops them into Date Movie willy-nilly, without taking any creative risks and adding more bite or naughtiness to them. It's as though he and his writing partner Friedman want to go for easy and cheap laughs without taking any chances.

He also has no, repeat, no sense of comedic timing. In a bit supposedly inspired by Bruce Almighty and There's Something About Mary, the viewer is forced to endure an overly long vignette involving Jinxler the Cat and a toilet. Had it been a quick-and-dirty sort of thing, it might have been funny. However, Seltzer lingers lovingly on this rather off-putting bit for over two minutes of running time.

As much as I enjoy a silly comedy every now and then (Thou shalt not live on action-adventure alone is my moviegoer's motto), and as much as I love even an admittedly in-your-face "stupid humor" film, I'm not amused by most of Date Movie. It's a waste of even Carmen Electra's rather limited talent, and it's waste of time and money.

Alyson Hannigan .... Julia Jones
Adam Campbell .... Grant Fockyerdoder
Sophie Monk .... Andy
Eddie Griffin .... Frank Jones
Meera Simhan .... Linda Jones
Fred Willard .... Bernie Fockyerdoder
Jennifer Coolidge .... Roz Fockyerdoder
Marie Matiko .... Betty
Judah Friedlander .... Nicky
Carmen Electra .... Anne
Tony Cox .... Hitch
Mauricio Sanchez .... Eduardo/Housekeeper
Beverly Polcyn .... Old Cart Woman
Valery M. Ortiz .... Jell-O
Charlie Dell .... Justice of the Peace

Recommended:
No

Yucandu Studio Just West of St. Louis, Mo.: Turning Junk into Works of Art

Maybe it’s just another roadside attraction, folk art, or maybe some folks that have too much time on their hands. Just motor west on Route 66 and check out the art that imitates life. There’s the guy who twists tree limbs into various shapes and animal forms, a welder whose land is littered with rusty iron beasts of every description and form. 

The Cadillac ranch down in Texas with the cars buried halfway into the ground, tailfins pointing up to the sky, the giant ketchup bottle, and of course, tributes to Elvis everywhere. Check out the world’s largest ball of string, rubber bands, videotape, and aluminum foil. This predilection for collecting a large number of everyday items and piecing them together has even invaded the church. At the Shrine of the Black Madonna near Eureka, Missouri, a dedicated Father spent some forty years collecting small rocks, pieces of broken glass and seashell to build the shrine.

For those of us who feel a little arts and craftsy but don’t want to spend an entire lifetime at it, there is a neat little “hands on” art gallery in Old Webster just west of St. Louis where you can satisfy your craving to piece together and help out the environment all at the same time: the Yucandu Art Studio takes ordinary things that others throw away and turns them into creative works of art and interesting displays. 

Some of the materials include cardboard, old windows and doors, and the mandatory bits of broken glass and china. Instead of calling a supplier for their art materials, dumpster diving is the stock up of choice. This summer Yucandu is planning several “rescue” art projects for their summer art camps. Old trophies that they have been collecting for a couple of years will become armatures for “Family Tree” sculptures.

Yucandu specializes in bringing art into your life by providing all of the materials and the teaching so Yucandu it. For the summer they have special classes on how to make mosaics for your garden. By using bits and pieces of all kinds of materials like tiles, china, glass, pottery pieces, and stones you can make many different and unique decorations that will last for years to come. Yucandu has projects that include mosaics, decoupage, glitter, and paint. Prices range from $5 to $150. By paying an hourly studio fee you can be assisted by staff, borrow tools, store unfinished projects, and best of all, leave all of the mess behind.

Thinking about making one of those clay ashtrays to get started? Here’s an interesting recipe for making the clay: Take 2 cups of dryer lint, firmly packed, and mix with 1/3 cup warm water, 6 tablespoons white glue, and one tablespoon of clear dish liquid. Measure all of the ingredients into an airtight plastic bag and knead thoroughly.

Yucandu Art Studio is at 20 Allen Avenue in Webster Groves, Missouri. For more information you can call them at (314) 963-4400.

Wildlife Photography: Tips to Learn the Basics of Wildlife Photography

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If you really want to learn the art of wildlife photography, then you should be aware of the basics of wildlife photography. It is rightly said that wildlife photography is one of the most challenging but rewarding hobby or career. It takes honest practice, persistence and hard work to master the real art of wildlife photography.

For mastering wildlife photography you have to have the basic knowledge of camera handling. As majority of the photos you take will be captured with the help of telephoto lens. This will test your patience and dedication as you have to wait a much longer time for the animal to come in the range and taking right pictures through right angles before that wild animal leaves from the site. Many of the times the animals you want to shoot will be yards away from you so that you have to take your pictures with more precision and care with zoom lenses.

While shooting wildlife you always have to watch out for minute movements happening around you. And for that purpose you have to be attentive for the longer time. The sunlight also plays a very important role in taking these wildlife pictures. For this purpose your camera should have the proper adjustments according to the various angles of sunlight so that pictures will be much clearer without any fuzz.

Also wildlife photography is all about capturing a particular moment of the wildlife. It makes or breaks your photography style. Many of the best wildlife photographers out there are really skillful in shooting the exact speed and momentum of the particular animal they are watching. But to be the best wildlife photographer out there you should first master the basics and you can begin this process by starting to shoot your own home pets. If you learn to shoot their natural movements and habits in their natural style then you can say that you are ready for outdoor wildlife photography.

There are no shortcuts to learn the basics of wildlife photography. Rather you have to practice it religiously and with full devotion. You should have to pay a special attention to your cameras. You have to take care that your camera has a quick shutter speed which is very necessary to take more than one shot as you roam around the wildlife to take pictures. In this type of photography most of the times you have to follow your subject to shoot many pictures at a time in one shot. This process is mainly known as "panning" which consists of taking faster pictures in one snap as you mover closer to a particular animal you want to shoot.

Thus wildlife photography is all about your patience, persistence and shooting skill where you need to wait a longer time to take the perfect picture. But at the end of the day it is also the most satisfying art where you get the really thrilling and enjoyable experience to cherish for.

Unique Baby Shower Favor

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If you are planning a baby shower for someone you are more than likely trying to think of unique baby shower favors. When it comes to creating a unique favor, the best thing to do is add a picture of the parents to be. This article will provide you with step by step instructions on how to make a baby bottle gift, which is a more personal, unique baby shower favor. 

You will need the following supplies to make this unique baby shower favor: 

A picture of the mom and dad to be (make sure you include any other siblings if they already have children.)
A small baby bottle (make sure you get enough for each guest)
Curling ribbon
Scissors
Small teddy Bear (you can also use a small baby bottle or other baby related item)
Glue Gun
Glue Stick
Candy (Whatever type of candy you prefer) 

This unique baby shower favor is very easy to assemble. The first thing you have to do is make several copies of the picture of the parents. Make sure you make enough for all of your guests. Then you can start putting the pictures on the baby bottle using the glue stick. 

First use the glue stick to put enough glue on the back of the copied picture to cover all of it. Then stick the picture onto the baby bottle. Make sure you smooth it out so that there are no wrinkles. Do the same to all of the bottles. The first bottle should be completely dry by the time you finish sticking on the last picture. 

Next you can begin to fill the bottles with candy, and putting the tops on the bottles. After all of the bottles are full you can tie the ribbon around the top of the bottles and make a bow. Then curl the edges of the ribbon using the scissors. Next you will need your glue gun and the bears, (or whatever small baby item you will be using. 

You can then glue the small bears onto the bottle, right at the center of the bow. Hold the bear on the glue for a few seconds until the bear stays in place. Then your baby bottle favor is complete. 

If you would prefer, you can use baby food jars for this as well. You can even create your own unique baby shower favors, just by being a little creative and using your imagination. Whatever you choose just make sure you remember to have fun.